A couple of weekends ago, I found myself going back to my childhood, listening to OMD (Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark). I can still remember sitting on my bed with the cassette tape cover spread out in front of me, reading the lyrics as the songs played. As I listened to those songs again, I […]
For the last few weeks, I have realized just how much of my life I had been living in fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of the “what if.” Fear of making the wrong decision. Fear of failing. Fear of succeeding. Just…fear. Ironically, I didn’t realize it because of something I was doing. I realized
A couple of weeks before this walk, something unexpected happened. I spent an entire day cleaning while listening to the music I loved as a preteen and teenager. Song after song seemed to be speaking directly to me. Memories surfaced, emotions surfaced, and I found myself reconnecting with a version of myself I hadn’t visited
Becoming All of Me Read More »
Last weekend, something happened that changed me. No one else could see it. There were no fireworks. No burning bush. No booming voice from heaven. Just a woman finally meeting herself after 50 years. Looking back, I don’t think I realized how far away from myself I had wandered. Maybe I never really knew myself
The last two mornings, I woke up early. Instead of lying in bed, I got myself up and went on a little walk. Yesterday, I stayed in the neighborhood where I live. As I walked, I remembered when I was younger and my mom would wake me up early to go walking with her. I
The Walk Itself Never Changed Read More »
For most of my life, I thought I was extroverted. I thought I loved noise.Loved people.Loved being the loud one in the room.Loved staying busy.Loved helping.Loved being needed. But recently I’ve started realizing something uncomfortable:I wasn’t energized by constant stimulation. I was surviving through it. My nervous system lived in activation for so long that
Not a Big Fish in a Small Pond, Just a Regular Fish That Desires the Ocean Read More »
The song that has been playing over and over in my head this morning is I’m in the Lord’s Army. I remember singing it as a child. “I may never march in the infantry, ride in the cavalry, shoot the artillery, but I’m in the Lord’s Army.” I haven’t heard that song since I was
Learning to Let My Old Self Dim Read More »
After recording episode 56, I needed some fresh air and sunshine. I have an electric scooter that I love to ride. It takes me back to being a kid…..wind in your hair, sunshine on your face. It brings a smile to me every time. So I headed to a local park. I just wanted to
Staying a Little Longer Changed Everything Read More »
I’m sitting here trying to write this blog, and my cat is directly in front of my screen—blocking everything. And as I try to see around this cute, fat cat, it hits me: This is my life. That cat blocking my view?That’s been my control.My need to be accepted.My need to manage everything. I can
My Cat Taught Me How to Let Go Read More »
I have been sitting in 1 Samuel 2:36 now for about 4 weeks. I’ve done 3 podcast episodes on this one verse, and I am still struggling with it. For the past few months, I’ve really been living these verses—learning them, living them, and then leaving them. But this one? This one has a tight
Sitting in Verse 36: Control and Its Grip Read More »
